(Haha I started this blog on New Years Day of 2013, hence the title of this entry, but didn't get around to finishing this entry until now. whoops)
This is probably the 9th or 10th blog I've created, but I'm hoping that I can stick to this one a little longer than the rest. I think the reasons why I don't blog or even journal anymore for that matter are: 1. I always have too much to say, 2. I sometimes don't know how to articulate or organize all my jumbled mess of thoughts, 3. I am a perfectionist (but slowly becoming less of one) so even when I am able to articulate my thoughts, I am never fully satisfied with how I expressed myself, 4. I am a busy person and value my time greatly, so compounded with the burden of taking longer than most people to articulate my thoughts, I usually give up blogging because there are other things (of higher priority) that I could be doing with my time....
HOWEVER. haha...I really do enjoy writing and getting my thoughts down and out. I feel like I'm always abandoning my creative or liberal artsy side by never journalling, blogging, or reading just for fun anymore...Anyway, the reason why I wanted to recreate another blog is so that I can have a place where I can freely express myself and learn how to articulate my thoughts. One of my problems (I feel) is that I have a hard time communicating with others, expressing myself, verbalizing my thoughts, speaking in complete sentences, unless I'm talking about something that I'm extreeeemely passionate about, something that I've thought about for a longggg time, or something that I've talked about a few times before.
The final reason why I don't journal/blog anymore is because 5. I am always afraid of readers judging my writing, and in the past, I've always written/blogged for an audience, which sometimes consisted of individuals I'd know and interact with personally.
I'm hoping that my writing will help me be more articulate, eloquent, clear, concise, informative, and expressive in how I portray/convey/present myself...meh I don't know. I have to start somewhere. Hopefully, this can not only be a tool to help me, but also a safe haven for freedom of expression, creativity, and growth.
Lastly, you're probably wondering why I named the blog "The Funny Flaxseed". Well, there's alliteration first, so it roles off the tongue nicely haha. The train of thought that led me to this name is as follows:
The "Flaxseed" part comes from back when I used to listen to violin music a lot, especially anything by Joshua Bell (I am STILL in love with him). Well, one of the Joshua Bell CDs I had--called "Romance of the Violin" featuring Joshua Bell playing a lot of really emotional and romantic pieces (it is SO beautiful, please listen to his version if you have the chance!!)--had the piece "The Girl with Flaxen Hair" by Debussy on it. I think the name really stood out to me, I mean, cmon, it's so freaking beautiful...Flaxen hair just sounds so special or something haha. Anyway, well, I thought about incorporating the word "Flaxen" in the blog title, but because I don't actually have flaxen or pale-yellow hair (I have dark dark brown/black hair) I thought about using the word "Flaxseed", because the flaxseeds that I've seen are a really dark brown color (although I just looked online and they can be either brown or yellow ha haaa!). Not only was the "Flaxseed" part of the title inspired by my past experiences and love for the violin and classical music, it also comes from my mom being a health nut and always emphasizing the health benefits of a lot of different foods, flaxseeds being one of them. Healthy eating and nutrition became a really big part of my life after found out a few immediate family members of mine had diabetes. I am also currently a Nutritional Sciences major, so I think the "Flaxseed" component of the title is really appropriate and personal in way. :)
The "Funny" aspect comes from a part of my personality that has always appreciated humor, comedy, and anything that makes one laugh. Growing up, I often portrayed myself with a silly and goofy personality ("cerebral lolsy" if you will-- I'll explain more about how that phrase was coined in another post some time), as a way for me to hide the problems and more serious emotions that I felt, smiling often and always trying to make others smile in order to distract myself (and hide from others around me) the hurt and sadness I felt sometimes. More recently though, like within the past year, I've become more serious and less silly with my personality because I am 21 years old and I think people started not taking me seriously (but more on that in another post). However, I will always think that a sense of humor brightens and lightens life, keeping things positive, fresh, and laid back (usually), and brings people together. Humor is a great thing in life and there will always be a side of me that enjoys a good laugh.
So there you have it. The etymology of my blog's name haha!
PS. Yall will soon find out that my diction can be simple but also creative. I tend to make up phrases/words/ideas to convey my thoughts when I feel like I can't find the right words--- examples like "cerebral lolsy", etc.
